Thu. Oct 1st, 2020

Quotes and Jokes

Afrikaanse grappe and English jokes

The shepherd and the auditor

2 min read

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a desrted road. Suddenly a brand brand new porche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets out and asks the shepherd, “If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?”

The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies, “okay.” The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a Nasa website, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 exel tables filled with algorithms and pivot tables.

He then printed out a 150-page report on his high-tech mini-printer, turns to the shepherd and says, “you have exactly 1,586 sheep.”

The shepherd cheers, “that’s correct, you can have your sheep.” The young man takes an animal and puts it in the back of his Porche.

The shepherd looks at him and asks, “if I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?”

The young man answers, yes, why not?” The shepherd says, “you are an auditor.”
“How did you know?” asks the young man.

“Very simple,” answers the shepherd. “Firstly, you came here without being wanted. Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and thirdly, you don’t understand anything about business.

“….now can I have my sheep back?

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