Nudist colony

An elderly man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day  there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous  petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an erection. The  woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, Did you call for  me? The man

Old man wanted to spade his garden

An old man lived alone in Cape Town. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Clemence, who used to help him, was in Polsmoor Prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament. Dear Clemence, I am feeling pretty bad because it

The sperm sample

95 yr old man is given a jar to provide a sperm sample 4 analysis at hospital. He turns up 2 days later with empty jar. Nurse asks why no . sample? He says sorry but I tried with my right hand, then my left! Then my wife tried with both hands! Then with

A glass of wine before turning in

A single glass at night could mean a peaceful, uninterrupted nights sleep. NEW Wine for Seniors - I kid you not..... Clare Valley vintners in South Australia, which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir, and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic. It is expected to reduce the number of

Two old friends met every day

Russ and Sam, two friends, very old and frail, met in the park every day to feed the birds, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Russ didn't ....show up. Sam didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something. But after Russ hadn't shown up for a

The problem with alzheimer’s

Three mischievous old Grannies were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. When an old Engine driver walked by. And one of the old Grandmas yelled out saying, Claude​! ​ We bet we can tell exactly how old you are. The old Engine driver said, There is no way you can guess it, you old fools. One of the old Grandmas

Why seniors still use newspapers

I was visiting my son last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper. This is the 21st century he said. We don't waste money on newspapers.  Here… use my iPad. I can tell you this….. that fly never knew what hit

At the root of every grey hair

At the root of every grey hair, there is a dead brain cell. Someone had to remind me, So I'm reminding you, too. Don't laugh..... It is all true! Perks of reaching 50 Or being over 60 And heading towards 70 or beyond! 1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released

Old vs New generation

Not sure why I am reading you this but I thought it would takes its place somewhere in you, its called A STUNNING SENIOR MOMENT A very self-important yuppie attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older

Life as a Senior Citizen is not getting any easier

Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again, asking why I didn't do something useful with my time. Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine is not a good thing .,  I said. Talking about my  doing-something-useful  seems to be her favorite topic of conversation. She was  only thinking of me  she said and suggested I go down
'